PSL - For Archie, Set After 4a

[amicustenebris]

With a kind of numbness that he hadn't felt since he cast Belle out of his castle and destroyed half his collection, Rumpelstiltskin made his way to civilization the very same night he was sent away. Once he hit the interstate it was not long before someone pulled over to offer help to the hobbling man, who looked like he'd wandered from a wreck. The stranger said they'd seen an abandoned car down the way a bit and offered to get him into town to call a tow truck.

He took advantage of his good fortune and was quickly able to access food, an ATM, a cane, and finally a place to collapse and eventually rent a car the following morning. He had thoughts of what he would have to do to figure out a way back over the town line. He understood the magic at work there, knew he could only go back in if summoned back in. But already the scheming began. Belle didn't understand his motivations, and he'd been incapable of correctly explaining. That was all there was to it. Part of him believed if he could say it right, if he could make sense of it all himself -- if he could just convince her that all she'd seen never meant he didn't love her? Then he could fix everything. Then he could be home with his wife, able to visit his son, able to walk and use magic.

He tried to call her from the phone in the motel. No answer. He tried a few times. There was an answer once. He couldn't speak.

Gold haunted that little hamlet outside of Ogunquit for a few days, with limited access to the internet or contact, just hoping he'd find some loophole that'd let him back in, afraid to wander out too far lest he lose his chance.

As far as he knew, Belle never caught on that he was calling. If she did, then she was patient. She stayed on the line longer than she needed. Spoke, and waited. Spoke. Then said goodbye. He couldn't work out why he could never say anything back, or even beg forgiveness. He kept doing it, knowing he couldn't stop himself crying afterward, knowing it was going to hurt every time, because he'd gotten so used to hearing her in the morning when she woke. And now when he called just to hear her it came with apprehension, certainty he'd hear that litany of accusations all over again, but he needed to. Maybe if he did speak, if he did let her know it was him, and he allowed it to happen, she might see he was sincere. She would forgive him. Remember she loved him. He would hand her the dagger and be her slave, be everything Zelena wanted him to be for her if that was what it took.

But he couldn't even bring himself to do that. It took him days to figure out why. That was when he headed south.

His rental car died just inside of Vermont. There were questions about his license. He switched to travel by bus from there -- crowded (good that he was traveling light), slow as sin -- he saw far more of the state than he really ever cared to. It felt ridiculously long for where he was headed, given how short a trip it had been by plane, but he didn't know if he could handle flying again. Not alone.

In Manhattan, the first place that he tried was Neal's old apartment, of course, and he did not expect to find it occupied -- by the Queen's married beau and his family, no less. They offered to leave it to him, which he declined. After a cursory search of the place, he found one or two familiar baubles, things his son held onto from his childhood all these years, somehow, things from their world, and he pocketed those, feeling an uncomfortable tightness that told him to get away, and he left as quickly as his legs could carry him.

Marion seemed especially keen to convince him to stay, at least until he found better accommodations.

He didn't trust it. He got away.

Crossing out into the evening air, he felt a rush of pent emotion and memory. Unkind words said in this very place. Hook's attack and his near death.

Then his actual death.

Then Neal's.

He went numb.

Comments

[amicustenebris]

The cabin, when compared to the hulking Queen Anne that Mister Gold was known to inhabit in town normally, was rather modest. Overlooking a pond teeming with waterfowl and fish, it was far enough off the beaten path to be the kind of quiet and removed that he needed. He busied himself largely with cleaning the place up, foraging in the immediate area, and taking care of the general landscape. Or tending his own clothing. As always, keeping his hands busy.

He didn't spin. There was no wheel left in the house but Belle might have pointed out that she hadn't seen one since before Neverland.

Anyone picking the charred remains of the farm might find what was left of one in the cellar there.

He had been very clear that he wished to be left alone, but that had more to do with people who knew him as the Dark One only and would be pestering him for business-related reasons first. If for some reason, someone like Henry had chosen to see him, he would not have turned him away. But he didn't exactly announce where he was.

Archie was not necessarily expected, but then he hadn't been at any turn so far. That alone should have led to some anticipation.

Gold was also not unaware that he might be seen as a safe neutral party if someone in town wanted something. "Doctor."

[contocricket]

"Hello, Gold." Archie gave his best smile as Pongo stood beside him. He adjusted the paper bag in his hand. "I know you mentioned on the road that you don't need to eat with your magic, but figured I'd bring something anyway. You seemed like you enjoyed cooking but I hadn't seen you in town."

[amicustenebris]

This is why you were gaining weight, he thought sourly to himself. With a roll of his eyes, he stands back away from the door to let him pass.

The kitchen was small but outfitted. There was also an outdoor oven and grill if he wanted to get especially creative, but even without, he could manage. While everything was freshly cleaned, however, the pantry and refrigerator were empty. Beyond that, the interior was warmly decorated. Lived in. Cozy, even.

"I suspect that is not the only reason you decided to call on me."

[contocricket]

"You're right. I was worried about you," Archie admitted.

Pongo laid down on the floor just outside the kitchen area. He watched the humans carefully, ready to get up and vacuum up anything they dropped.

"I'm guessing what happened to the farmhouse was you?"

[amicustenebris]

"I cannot imagine why. My magic returned; I am not going to make any surprise trips to the hospital now."

Just, completely ignoring any other possible reason he might have. Also the notion of him seeking medical help here, especially considering who ran the hospital here? Was a touch laughable.

"And that depends entirely upon what you are referring to, specifically."

[contocricket]

"Maybe not, but you don't usually seclude yourself like this. At least occasionally I could see you around town, but I haven't seen you even once since you got your dagger back. I was worried."

He set the groceries down on the counter.

"The farmhouse burned down. Now, it's not impossible that it might've gotten struck by lightning and it burned down since nobody was out there to call the fire department, but I think it's unlikely." He held up a hand. "Not that I'd blame you for it. Honestly, given what Zelena did to you there, it makes perfect sense." He paused, then decided that perhaps it'd help Gold if he heard this next part. "To be fair, some days I think about doing the same to Hook's ship."

[amicustenebris]

"Well, if you ever want an alibi," Gold quipped with half a smile.

Though, truth be told, he would have been a terrible character witness to vouch for him, since Jones would be more likely to blame the Dark One over anyone else.

"When your quarry goes to ground, leave none to go to," he muttered. "If she ever does find a way back it would be the first place she would choose to lie low." At least in the hopes of finding any bits of her magic she left behind.

[contocricket]

"Honestly, I'd probably do it and then turn myself. You'd be an alibi to verify that, yes, I did do it."

Because most people would find it incredibly difficult to believe that Archie would do such a thing.

He looked curiously at Gold. "Why would Marian go to the farmhouse?"

[amicustenebris]

It was only then that he realized he hadn't really explained who they were avoiding. "I already told you that wasn't Marian."

[contocricket]

"I know, but saying 'the woman who replaced Marian' all the time is a mouthful." He raised a brow. "In any case, why would she go to the farmhouse?"

[amicustenebris]

"Because it's where she lived last." The pronoun game was hardly fair but plausible deniability was fun, in its own way. "Do you think I threaten the lives of pregnant women lightly?"

[contocricket]

"But the only other person who lived there was -- "

Archie cut himself off as he put the pieces together.

"But she killed herself."

[amicustenebris]

"Actually, I killed her." Shortly after proposing. "But she appears to have gotten better."

[contocricket]

Archie expected his conscience would be upset at the admission of murder, but it didn't make a peep. Though that was understandable: Gold had done what was necessary to free himself after being kidnapped. He couldn't condemn the man for that.

If he'd had the courage to do such a thing and had had the opportunity on Hook's ship, wouldn't he have done the same thing?

"...So Zelena's back. Sort of." He removed his glasses as he closed his eyes, rubbing at his eyelids. "I guess we're lucky she's out there. For now, at least."

[amicustenebris]

He was free when Regina stopped him from taking revenge at the farm. When he ended her in that prison cell (and made it look like a suicide) it hadn't been about him.

His child was dead because of her, and there was no way to bring him back. The Dark One did not need to hear the Queen or anyone else spout about how killing her would not restore his son either. This was not going to be that kind of story for him, where vengeance was somehow meaningless.

No. Bae was gone, and the only thing that meant is that if she dared to darken his doorstep, nothing was going to save her.

"Eventually, Regina will have to know. I kept it to myself because I could not risk word getting back to her and another avenue opening for Zelena to go back and resume making trouble."

[contocricket]

"Did you think I would invite her back like how I came to get you?"

It took effort not to sound hurt by that thought. However, given the circumstances, he knew that it was a valid concern.

[amicustenebris]

"I think Regina might invite her back out of some misguided desires of her own." A careful glance. "It had little to do with you."

[contocricket]

"Sorry." Archie shook his head. "I should've known better."

After all, they'd spent quite a lot of time together recently.

"But you're right: There is a distinct possibility Regina might want to connect with Zelena. They are half-sisters, after all."

[amicustenebris]

"A half-sister who disguised herself as the dead wife of her true love, forcing a separation. Who also, I will remind you, has used the same deception to get pregnant." One could hardly tell if he believed Regina would try to invite her back, somehow, still, seeing it was the "moral thing to do" -- making her more of an idiot than he took her for -- or if she might decide reconciliation was not in the cards after all. In a more permanent sense.

[contocricket]

"True," Archie said, "but she's also the only blood family Regina has left regardless of everything else she's done. Regina might want to give her a second chance despite all that because Cora helped ruined both their lives."

"Helped" because Regina and Zelena had both made bad choices without their mother's direct influence. They still could have made better choices once they were no longer under the terrible woman's thumb though it would have been harder than someone who had been raised by good parental figures.

Archie saw a good example of someone who struggled with staying on the right path instead of giving into patterns their awful parents had taught them every time he looked in the mirror.

[amicustenebris]

"All the same, you can imagine why I was not too keen on making this point on the map easier for her to converge on at the same time that I was." He settled to putting away the things that Archie had brought that needed it. "And as far as I know none of this is in danger of happening until she knows."

Not that he was not pleased to have the subject of the burnt remains of the farmhouse somewhat behind them.

[contocricket]

Archie nodded. "She might think we're still sightseeing for a while given how we wandered around."

Which had been the whole point.

Burning the farmhouse down...well, Gold knew that it hadn't been the right thing to do even if it had been an understandable thing to do. At this point, trying to bring it up would just lead to an unnecessary fight.

Though he knew he was about to poke the bear with a stick anyway.

"I'm guessing you're trying to figure out what to do next in regards to Zelena, but have you thought about Belle?"

[amicustenebris]

As if he never thinks of her. If he were a snake there would have been venom dripping from every last syllable. "For now I have done all I intend to do," he said icily.

[contocricket]

In his head, Archie heard a familiar phrase: Ladies and gentlemen, let's get ready to rumble!

"I understand separating from her for a while, giving both of you space to rethink things, but you just left divorce papers without a word."

[amicustenebris]

Gold shut his eyes and took a calming breath as he turned toward the counter. "Doctor, prior to this marriage I was married once already, and if divorce papers had been an option, then, it would have been less tragic an ending for everyone involved. Holding out hope for something irreconcilably broken only makes the outcome worse." A moment to muster himself, collect his words. And not say more than what has been concluded. "If you ask her yourself, she will tell you that she no longer trusts that I love her. ...And I don't trust her at all anymore. So it needs to end."